


Renji's Confession

by junko



Series: Scatter and Howl [60]
Category: Bleach
Genre: Hand Jobs, M/M, Rutting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-01
Updated: 2017-02-01
Packaged: 2018-09-21 11:07:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9546062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/junko/pseuds/junko
Summary: Renji should really just learn when to shut up.





	

After blurting out his confession, Renji hazarded a glance at Byakuya. 

No surprise, he’d gone all stony. These days, Renji could easily tell the subtle differences between Byakuya’s relaxed empty expression and his pissed off, closed-down one. This was definitely the latter.

“Don’t get like that,” Renji said. He wished he could nudge Byakuya’s toe under the table or something like that, but Byakuya sat in stiff-back seiza. And the table between them was too low, anyway. “Look, I ain’t betrayed you or nothing like that. It was just a peck on the cheek.”

Byakuya glanced up briefly, but turned his face away to glare at the garden. Renji noticed Byakuya had some kind of hairpiece on again, but it didn’t quite look like the kenseikan. For one, the little combs--or whatever they were--were so much smaller. They didn’t seem to be doing much to hold his hair back, either. That younger, more vulnerable, just-out-of-bed look was killing Renji. 

Yet, just seeing those bone white pieces did something else to Renji’s stomach, too--clenching muscles in the wrong places instead of the right ones. 

The prince had a crown again. 

This stark kimono of his was impressive, too. Renji could see why Kinjo called it a ‘war’ kimono. There was something simplified and militaristic about its cut and style, even though it could not have looked richer, gleaming almost sliver, as it did. Maybe it was the lack of the usual painted or printed design that made it seem so harsh and serious.

It might be rich as fuck, but it was all business, no nonsense, all the same.

Byakuya’s continued silence felt weighted and tense. Renji got the distinct impression that talking wasn’t helping, but he didn’t know what else to do. “Are you mad?” Renji finally asked. “I mean, you seem furious. But, I only told you because I didn’t want it to be some kind of a big thing, you know? It’s not like Captain Ōtoribashi means anything to me. I mean, I don’t even really know the guy--”

Still glowering at the pine tree branches out the window, Byakuya said, “But he is your type, Renji.”

“Since when?”

That got Byakuya to turn his attention to Renji in a hurry. “Since… look at him! He’s very fine-boned, flawless skin… pretty, even.” Byakuya said that last bit with a tiny little sneer. “He’s very strong. Obviously, he’s a minor noble.... and a rope master.”

Renji shook his head with a little laugh. “Yeah, no. The rope thing? I mean, I can’t pretend he’s not good at his job and I didn’t appreciate that, but physically? If you lined up all the guys I’ve been with before you--” The way Byakuya’s eyes went wide made Renji pause and raise his hands, “Not like there’s a lot of them, okay?! I’m just trying to say, that I think my ‘type’ is different from what you think my ‘type’ is! I’m a lot more flexible than noble and pretty! And, anyway, what’s that got to to do with anything? I don’t even know this guy. I ain’t going to dump you for him just ‘cuz he’s got nice hair.”

“So you admit his hair is nice,” Byakuya huffed.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake! Yes, Captain Ōtoribashi has nice hair,” Renji said, throwing his arms up. “But I’m not marrying your hair!”

That seemed to stop Byakuya short. His mouth had opened slightly, and it hung there in a very not-like-Byakuya moment of genuine shock. Finally, he sucked in a breath and seemed to compose himself. “You’re still serious about marriage?”

“Aren’t you?” Renji let his arms drop and he frowned. “Did the plan change when I wasn’t looking?”

Renji couldn’t help a nervous glance at that funky, new hairpiece, because if anything was going to change things between them it would be down to that fucking clan of Byakuya’s. 

“No, of course not,” Byakuya said, picking up his forgotten tea bowl again to take a sip. Whatever he found in there must have grown cold, because he made a little face at it, and reached for the pot. “It’s just that we had such a tremendous fight about it all. I ended up in prison for it, in a way, since the fraternization came out because of our argument. We haven’t talked much of it since, and then the clan war, and… I just wasn’t sure you were still feeling the same way.” Byakuya’s fingers traced the lip of his bowl for a moment, his eyes downcast. “And, I know it isn’t like you, Renji--the whole idea of marriage.”

Was that fair? Renji sucked on his teeth for a second, in thought, and then decided, yeah, it was fair enough. 

It wasn’t that he objected the idea of being in a committed, long-term relationship with another man. If he had objections, they were to the whole idea of marriage, in general--but also marriage into the Kuchiki, specifically. 

Legal stuff baffled Renji, honestly. Why was it necessary to make formal something that’d happen anyway? He knew plenty of couples who were functionally married. Look at Ikkaku and Yumichika, or, for that matter Captains Kyōraku and Ukitake! They didn’t need some document to make what they had any more real than it already was. Still, if the little extra made Byakuya feel more secure, what was the harm? Renji was all in, no matter what. “It’s important to you, so--”

“Yes, but that’s your answer to everything!” Byakuya snapped, his eyes flashing up and his fist hitting the table.

Renji startled at the unexpected violence. “Whoa! Where’s this coming from?”

Byakuya’s lips went thin. He very deliberately removed his hand from the table and laid it palm-flat against his thigh. “Your letter to Ōtoribashi. I have no idea what you like, only what you’re willing to do for me.” Renji wanted to laugh and say ‘hey, that’s meant to be a feature, not a bug,’ but when Byakuya looked up at him again, it took his breath away. There was such raw pain in his eyes. “Sometimes I think you don’t trust me. I fear that I’ve hurt you too much, too deeply, and so you kept some part of yourself from me. And, that this laissez-faire/anything-goes attitude of yours is, in fact, a shield, a barrier between us. I worry that you just ‘roll’ with things to keep from being honest with me. That’s why hearing that Captain Ōtoribashi is making a move on you… angers me--no, terrifies me so very much. I feel you could all too easily slip from me, since I don’t even know what you truly enjoy as opposed to what you just put up with to please me.”

“Aw, c’mon that was just a stupid letter,” Renji said, not sure how to deal with this sudden intensity from Byakuya. Especially since… Renji didn’t want to think too hard about any of that stuff right now--or maybe ever. “I didn’t know what to write, okay? You know I suck at fantasy stuff.”

“It’s more than the letter and you know it,” Byakuya said. “Your questionnaire is almost entirely filled with ‘I don’t know how I feel about it, but would try it for him.’”

And Byakuya’d know, because he’d clearly memorized that stupid thing. “That’s ‘cuz I’m new to this. I ain’t tried half that stuff! Cripes, half the time, I didn’t even know what it was!”

“Yes, and I think that’s the most telling, Renji. You didn’t even know what was being asked of you, how much pain or humiliation it might entail, but you would still try it for me?” Byakuya’s hands had curled into fists and he took a moment to slowly unfurl them. “It would be one thing if I could rely on your safeword, but you’re even hesitant to use that with me.”

Renji felt ambushed, cornered. All because he confessed to some stupid, meaningless kiss? None of this was fair, either. It wasn’t like Renji could start demanding vanilla sex when Byakuya didn’t seem entirely capable of it. Of course Renji’d rather go with the flow, if it was that or nothing! 

He could hear himself growling. Renji really just wanted to flip over the little table and storm out. But, Byakuya was making an effort to stay calm, so he should, too. He sucked in a gulp of air and let it out through his nose.

“Fine, okay, you know what’s wrong with safewords?” Renji snarled. “It ain’t about trusting you. I feel like I lost the fight when I have to use one. Unless I’m actually unable to breathe or something, it feels like I have to admit I’m too weak to take it. I don’t like giving up. It don’t come natural.”

Byakuya’s hand left his thigh to pinch the bridge of his nose. “Dear gods, Renji. It’s not supposed to be a sign of weakness, it’s supposed to be communication. You’re supposed to be letting me know if you don’t like something, not just if it’s killing you.”

“Yeah, well, maybe I suck at being a bottom,” Renji said in a huff. He crossed his arms in front of his chest, taking his turn at staring angrily at the pine bough. “It’s not like you’re going to let me top you any time soon, so what else are we gonna do? And let’s get real, you freak out at a hug. You want to know what I like? I like hugging. I like slow touching all over. Both people touching each other at the same time, nobody held down, nobody tied up. You’d be in apoplectic shock if we did that!”

“And this,” Byakuya’s voice was as sharp as the razor edge of steel and just as cold. “This is why Ōtoribashi’s kiss infuriates me. I can’t give you what you want. Anyone would be a better lover to you than I am.”

“Except I don’t love nobody else,” Renji spat back. “So I guess we’re fucking stuck with each other!”

Byakuya frowned into his bowl of tea for several long moments. A month or two ago, they wouldn’t still be sitting here, giving death glares to the tea tray and the pine tree. Someone would have thrown a punch or a slap. Backs would have been turned and the door’s slam would be ringing in someone’s ear. 

After several beats of nothing but the sound of their angry breathing, Byakuya let ot a long, slow breath. “So, what are we going to do, Renji?”

“I dunno,” Renji said agreeably. 

“There are things you like about what we do,” Byakuya said slowly, as if uncertain. “You must. You’ve picked out toys for us. You’ve encouraged certain things over others, have you not?”

“Yeah, you know I have,” Renji said. It didn’t quite seem like an adequate response, so he leaned over the table and squeezed Byakuya’s hand where it rested on his thigh. He put a soft kiss on the tip of Byakuya’s nose. “And you let me spoon you. You hardly ever push me off ya at night any more.”

Byakuya chuckled lightly, but his tone was dry: “Yes, I’m so very giving.”

Renji moved down to Byakuya’s mouth, sucking patiently at lips until they parted reluctantly for him. Pulling away, Renji smiled wolfishly, “How could I not love someone this petulant and stubborn?”

“Petulant?” Byakuya scoffed, but there was a smile. 

His other hand finding its way into silken hair beside Byakuya’s ear, Renji teased, “You want me to call you ‘spoiled’ instead?”

“No, never,” Byakuya snapped, even as he leaned into his touch. “Even if it’s true. I’ll take petulant.”

“Hey, I’m saddled with ‘willful,’” Renji reminded him with another kiss, this one on the earlobe.

“But, Renji… “

Putting a finger on Byakuya’s lips, to stop what was sure to be another appeal to ‘figuring’ them out, Renji said, “Want to know what I really want?” 

Dutifully keeping his mouth shut, Byakuya nodded. It was surprisingly hot, this tiny bit of contriteness, this small concession. 

Renji removed his finger and angled for a kiss, “I want you to shut up and kiss me.” He meant to go in passionate, but when the table banged his knees, Renji pulled back. “And I want this fucking table out of the way.”

With a small smile, Byakuya helped Renji shift things aside. “Making out isn’t really a solution,” he said, but lifted his end of the table all the same. “We need to have a serious talk.”

“And here I thought dating a stoic dude like you would mean no one would ever say, ‘honey, we need to talk,’” Renji said crawling over to where Byakuya still sat in ramrod straight seiza. He rubbed Byakuya’s nose playfully. 

“Believe me, I’m not fond of it either.” With a sigh, Byakuya draped his arms around Renji’s shoulders. His fingers tangled in hair, tugging Renji in for a brief kiss. “But, we’re planning on going to the Human World to be wed. If you can’t even tell me how you really feel about that, there’s no point in going through with it. Much less a foursome, where I would have to spend the entire time wondering if you’re actually enjoying yourself and not just grinning and bearing it.”

Renji pulled back, sharply, “You can’t cancel the foursome!”

Byakuya’s hands hung in the air, in the position they’d been in, fingers curled around phantom hair. He dropped them with a huff of breath. “Renji. Captain Ōtoribashi is a bondage master. If you won’t use the safeword except on pain of death, how is this going to work? I can’t have fun, if I think you’re suffering… in a way you don’t enjoy.”

Renji’s mind immediately went to the humbler and he felt his skin flush. Yeah, some suffering was seriously fun. Sitting back on his heels, Renji tugged his ear. “Well, couldn’t we just have a regular orgy or something?”

Byakuya’s jaw flexed a little. “As you so astutely pointed out, I’m not very skilled in that particular department.”

“We could practice,” Renji’s grin was wolfish, as he moved in again. This time he didn’t hesitate, but quickly caught up Byakuya’s mouth. 

When Byakuya opened for him, Renji wondered if he’d ever get tired of the taste of expensive tea on this man’s lips. Plus, the sensation of Byakuya’s tongue, so firm and slightly pointed at the tip, caused Renji’s imagination to go into overdrive with memories and... fantasy. Had he ever seen Byakuya’s tongue licking the tip of his cock? He couldn’t remember, but he’d seen it enough tracing lines of tattoos… 

Crap, he was already hard.

Byakuya’s hands were in his hair again, tugging at the feeble bit of silk. Not wanting it to break, Renji left the kiss with a disappointed moan in order to undo it properly. 

Byakuya’s eyes were hot on him. Hands hungrily tugged at obi, desperately unwinding it. Yeah, Renji thought, let’s get out of these clothes. He was flushed and hot already. Maybe it was the flirting with Ōtoribashi earlier, but Renji just wanted to be naked NOW, right here, in the middle of the afternoon in Byakuya’s study. 

After tossing the hair tie aside, he used his shoulders to shrug out of the shitage and kosode. 

Another thing Renji never got tired of was seeing how rapt Byakuya became any time his hair was down and his tattoos were on display. His face would heat just enough to pink those sharp, alabaster cheeks. And his eyes… sometimes it felt like it was hard enough to get Byakuya’s attention--when he did, those distant gray eyes became a stormfront: intense, focused, almost dangerously wild.

Long, cool fingers instantly spread across Renji’s pectorals, making him shiver. Obi loose but not completely undone, hakama slipped down hips. Silk tangled up against Renji’s crotch. The weight of the silk against hot, aching need felt binding in an exquisite way, especially since he’d spread his legs around Byakuya’s knees.

Smiling down at Byakuya, though the thick curtain of hair that had fallen in front of his eyes, Renji stretched provocatively under Byakuya’s possessive hands. His voice a deep growl, as he asked: “You feeling all jealous of Ōtoribashi? Maybe you ought to reclaim me.”

Byakuya’s arms slipped around to grasp Renji’s waist firmly and he pulled Renji closer. Lips brushed against taut stomach. If Renji hadn’t already been hard, this would have done it. Kneeling upright like he was, with Byakuya still tucked into proper seiza… well. The position, alone, was just kind of hot, wasn’t it? 

Looking down on that funky non-kenseikan thing while Byakuya’s wet tongue traced outlines of muscle and strayed so perilously close to Renji’s erection, still all bound up in loose hakama and half-discarded shitagi. 

All that tongue going everywhere but cock was the biggest fucking tease ever, and if Renji wasn’t careful he was going to pop like some premature schoolboy just from this.

It didn’t help that Byakuya went after Renji’s flesh like a starving man: licks and bites and even his fingernails dug into hip and back. 

A powerful suck on abdomen made Renji yelp… then chuckle darkly, “Oh, I get it. You’re marking me.” Sure enough, Byakuya’s attentions had left a little welt just to the left of his hipbone. Renji shifted, indicating that he wanted to lay back, give Byakuya more ‘canvas’ to paint, as it were. “But, Taicho, no one’s going to see a mark down there.”

Holding him tightly, Byakuya glanced up the length of him. His eyes were hot and fierce. “I don’t care. Here is where I want to mark. Perhaps on your backside, as well.”

The laugh that came out of Renji was tempered with spike of arousal. “You wanna to put a hickey on my ass?” 

No response, just that serious look from Byakuya and a little nudge with his hands, implying: ‘turn around.’ But, then, he stopped, peering up at Renji with a little frown as if trying assess his expression. Finally, Byakuya asked, “Unless you object?”

Renji was already turning around. “No! Green light!” he insisted tugging at the stupid, stubborn mess of hakama, shitagi, and kosode. “Go word!” Finally whatever knot had been holding up his hakama came free. Silk slipped down, nearly tripping him up as he switched positions. 

Byakuya chuckled at Renji’s frantic antics. Hands on Renji’s hips. Lips and tongue traced tattoos on exposed skin. Muscles and other things tightened, making it hard for Renji to stay upright. He collapsed onto all fours with a moan. 

Against the skin of his backside, he felt Byakuya murmur, “How could pleasing you fail to arouse me? To see such a man shivering under my attention? Yes. Tell me what you want, Renji.”

Arouse? Did Byakuya just say ‘arouse’ out loud? Just when Renji was going to say something in response, Byakuya chose the spot to place his hickey--just under the fold of Renji’s butt cheek, mere millimeters from his balls. As suction kicked in and teeth worked, all Renji could do was gasp a string of nonsense syllables. Yeah, he was a shivering mess. His nipples erect, his cock hard--all Renji wanted to do was--“Touch me,” he managed, “Or let me touch.”

Byakuya made a little noise and, at first, Renji wasn’t sure what the answer was, but then all of a sudden Byakuya shifted. A hand tentatively slipped around Renji’s cock. He gasped at the gentleness of the touch and the surprise. More surprising still was the weight of Byakuya’s body settling against his back. Renji could feel Byakuya’s erection hard beneath the silk that rested against his thigh, nudging his balls. Byakuya wrapped his other arm around Renji’s chest, hugging him tightly, fingers reaching for nipple, but seemingly content just to grip pectorals. 

Most startling of all? The lips that pressed close to Renji’s ear. Hot breath tickling skin, almost more tantalizing than the fingers stroking his cock. 

What the fuck was all this attention?

Deciding not to risk losing it by saying anything, Renji closed his eyes and enjoyed the flood of sensations. Byakuya’s scent, that wildflower smell mingled with manly musk, filled Renji’s nostrils. The brush of his lips, the softness of hair and silk on Renji’s fevered skin, the strength of his grip, the clever fingers that stroked and played. Reiatsu, too, surrounding him tentatively.

“Tell me what you like,” Byakuya breathed into Renji’s ear, eliciting a moan.

“All of it,” Renji panted. “Yes. More.”

“Specifics?” Byakuya’s voice was amused, fond.

“Faster,” Renji gasped. “Harder.”

“Good." The smile was obvious in Byakuya’s voice as he hurried to comply. Fingernails dug into chest. Byakuya thrust himself against Renji’s backside, and tightened his grip on leaking cock. 

Renji responded by arching back, driving hard into silk-covered erection. Byakuya's mouth was so close to Renji’s ear that Renji could hear each hitch of breath, each tiny, aroused noise that escaped Byakuya’s lips as they moved together. Despite the silks between them, he could feel the heat of Byakuya’s body against his own sweaty skin. Huffs of breath matching his own.

The intimacy of it made Renji’s head swim. His heart felt ready to beat right out of his chest. His whole body was on fire. Renji wasn’t sure if he’d ever felt so much of Byakuya’s body all at once before. Legs touching, ass tucked up against crotch, his body pressing against Renji’s back, hand holding on so tight, lips to ear… and that hand… touching all the right places. Renji groaned, his whole body wracked with a shudder. He was so close, so tight, so hard.

To Renji’s shock, it was Byakuya who gasped: “I think I’m going to cum.” 

Just from pleasing him? That was it. Renji was utterly undone. A wave of pleasure hit like a tsunami. “Oh fuck. Gods, me, too!” 

Byakuya gasping in his ear and shuddering against his body only served to made Renji’s release that much stronger. It rushed out on the heels of a strangled cry. Waves that kept coming and coming. Renji's arms gave out, head hitting hands as he shuddered and gasped. Then, just when he thought every ounce of pleasure must have been wrung from his body, Byakuya moaned, “Oh, Renji. Oh, gods, I love you,” and another wave hit him hard.

Eventually, they were both so spent they slowly slumped to the floor. Byakuya continued to spoon Renji and for a long moment, they just lay there trying to catch their breath. Eventually, Renji managed to gather enough energy to roll around to face Byakuya. Byakuya’s face was gorgeous--so erotically disheveled and flushed. His expression wasn’t entirely under control yet either, his mouth hung slightly open and his pupils were blown. He seemed too exhausted to resist Renji’s snuggling… or maybe he welcomed it, after this whole experience Renji wasn’t sure. But, regardless, Byakuya tucked his head up under Renji’s chin, their arms wrapped loosely around each other, legs tangled, silks in disarray.

“I think we wrecked another kimono,” Renji muttered.

“Mmmm,” Byakuya said sleepily, “I’m sure this old thing could use more joy in its life.”

“If you say so,” Renji said skeptically. Though now that Byakuya was all stretched out, Renji could see that the kimono didn’t entirely fit him. It seemed to belong to someone much smaller, less broad. Running his fingers along the tight seams, Renji was a little amazed Byakuya hadn’t burst them. “Whose was this?”

“Grandfather's,” Byakuya said. “It would come out of storage whenever Ginrei needed to be his most unyielding.”

“Ugh.” Renji had never met this grandfather, but he couldn't help but hate the man. ‘Unyielding’ seemed like a nice thing to say about him, from what Renji could tell. Flaming jerkface seemed more appropriate. 

“I was afraid that today I would have to order the deaths of women and children,” Byakuya said, his voice soft against Renji’s skin. “I thought, if I wore it, I could borrow on Genrei’s strength. But, my mistake was to confuse bullying for strength. It has… too often been a mistake of mine.”

Renji gently rubbed Byakuya’s shoulder. It was a good apology for things in the past, especially since it was precipitated by action. 

Byakuya took in a breath, his shoulders relaxing against Renji. “But, no more. I thought that the only way out of this clan war was more death, but, instead, I will fill my house with life. Perhaps, in time, the hostages will come to appreciate their situation and understand my motivations.”

“I’m sure they will,” Renji agreed. He put a kiss on the top of Byakuya’s head, mostly managing to avoid the new hairpiece. “Anybody who spends ten minutes around you respects you. Anybody who really knows you, would follow you to Hell and back. Gods know, I would.” Renji kissed Byakuya again. “Of course, I get extra benefits. And, you know, I love you and stuff.”

Renji waited for a few seconds, expecting some kind of reply to that--if nothing else an admonishment for being so inarticulate in his love confession. Instead, all he heard were soft snores.

Byakuya fell asleep?

Could today be any more astonishing? Renji lay there, content to cuddle, until he felt himself drifting off with a smile on his face.

**Author's Note:**

> Not only am I normally slow writing sex scenes, but also democracy seems to be collapsing, so I've been out in the streets trying to shore that up. My apologies for the delay.


End file.
